Tony Blair and Gordon Brown are worried about the state of the polls and decide that they need to do something to try and gain a decent share of the vote in the countryside. They come up with a plan and head off kitted out in Barbours, flat caps and with a Golden retriever.
Arriving in a country pub they take their place at the bar and intend to talk to all the locals. Unfortunately, nobody really wants to talk to them. After a while an old guy wanders through from the other bar, looks them up and down and then turns to the retriever and lifts up it’s tail. He then wanders off without uttering a word.
A couple of minutes later another old bloke comes through and once again looks them up and down, lifts up the dogs tail and then wanders off.
This happens a couple more times before Tony and Gordon decide to ask the barman what on earth is going on. “Well,” he says, “someone saw you here earlier, went into the other bar and told the locals that there was a dog in the other bar with two arseholes.”