Rectal Prolapse Imminent

Perhaps this is too much information, but my colon is doing it’s best to exit my body today. I’m not sure what’s caused it (Black pudding, beer, picking my nose) but I’ve got a terrible attack of the squits, with some nausea.

Thankfully I’ve managed to make it all the way to Boots without lagging myself and have purchased some Pepto-Bismol, that pink stuff that generally sits in the medicine cabinet for decades because most people are afraid to drink it.

I can verify that it smells disgusting but doesn’t actually taste as bad as it might. I’ll be sure to let everyone know when I’ve stopped the flood out of my bum.

By rutty

Tall. Likes brass bands. Tests your software